{"id":864,"date":"2015-02-27T21:19:18","date_gmt":"2015-02-27T21:19:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/?p=864"},"modified":"2015-08-28T05:35:18","modified_gmt":"2015-08-28T05:35:18","slug":"night","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/?p=864","title":{"rendered":"Into the Night"},"content":{"rendered":"

Into the night<\/strong><\/p>\n

I know I should have stayed with you the night before you died<\/p>\n

I know you squeezed my hand that night though no-one said you could<\/p>\n

I knew that you were asking me to<\/p>\n

stay<\/p>\n

the night<\/p>\n

I knew it as you grasped<\/p>\n

I knew it as I told myself it could not be<\/p>\n

I knew it at as I kissed your blood-drained cheek and waived and lightly promised to be back<\/p>\n

Why, why, why<\/p>\n

did I go<\/p>\n

out in the dark<\/p>\n

the air was cold and taunting,<\/p>\n

The night before you died.<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

The call came just as the family sat down to dinner<\/p>\n

a pot of red soup on the stove,<\/p>\n

luckily no longer in my hands,<\/p>\n

else I might've dropped everything.<\/p>\n

I'll drive you you said<\/p>\n

We left the children crying,<\/p>\n

car riding on a growing wave of pain<\/p>\n

Sliding into the parking-lot, I noticed a throng of Philippinos<\/p>\n

Entering the building, voices a gaggle.<\/p>\n

They beat us to it, So eager to leave<\/p>\n

their last respects<\/p>\n

At the door<\/p>\n

a stranger shot me<\/p>\n

his hand. "Madam," he lurched with a smile, "I am so sorry about<\/p>\n

your father." My blood<\/p>\n

over<\/p>\n

boiled.<\/p>\n

Of course I know they only meant well!<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

In the master bedroom<\/p>\n

I found my father<\/p>\n

dead in the shape of a scream,<\/p>\n

Whose?<\/p>\n

I would wander<\/p>\n

for hours and days and years on end<\/p>\n

To whom does the scream belong:<\/p>\n

To the Old Man, finally let go<\/p>\n

Or<\/p>\n

To the Foreign Male,<\/p>\n

but a Boy, first day on the job,<\/p>\n

now a man, possibly panicked brutal<\/p>\n

in the face<\/p>\n

of loss<\/p>\n

of livelihood?<\/p>\n

No matter,<\/p>\n

now it is mine.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Into the night I know I should have stayed with you the night before you died I know you squeezed my hand that night though no-one said you could I knew that you were asking me to stay the night I knew it as you grasped I knew it as I told myself it could …<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2886,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[14],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/864"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2886"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=864"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/864\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":943,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/864\/revisions\/943"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=864"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=864"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blogs.bananot.co.il\/39\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=864"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}